So our awesome foodie friends Bob & Jane, who know Paris like the back of their hands, highly recommended Les Ombres to us. And VdV Does Not Argue with Bob & Jane. Period. They Know Their Shit, feel me? So, we phoned our dude Sanjay at the hotel we typically stay in, and told him to hook us up À tout de suite. Getting a resie at this place is a pretty hot ticket right now, and is located in the beautiful Museé du Quai Branly, in the 7th just off the Seine. Branly had an incredible African art exhibit BTW. Highly recommended by VdV. Tons of ancient masks, intricate wood carvings…but hell, let’s get serious: y’all don’t come here to expand your knowledge of African culture!

So, first off, Festus. It’s not pronounced ‘LAZE HAHM-BRAZE’, you annoying Texan tourist. They didn’t name this for the Spanish meaning for a dude, OK? But wait. It’s also not ‘LEZ AHM-BREH’. Yep, that’s what I thought, Francophile that I am. Dumbass. It’s pronounced ‘LEZ AHM’. WTF happened to the last 4 letters, 3 of ‘em consonants?! Those crazy French! FYI, translation is ‘The Shadows’, prolly because it is in the shadows of the Eiffel Tower.

The restaurant is located on the roof of the museum, full of windows and great views, especially of the Eiffel Tower, but also a good part of the Right Bank as well (nothing like Le Jules Verne, but in a  city of relatively few high rises still offers some awesome panoramas), and you can walk out on the roof terrace as well. Gee whiz, was that a run-on sentence for the ages, or what? Weather permitting they also serve outdoors (but don’t quote me on that).

So after we knocked back a couple pops, we ordered din din. Wanna hear about it? Here it goes!

Wild Sea Bass Ceviche (29 Euro), with Green Mango and Shiso. Although the bass was very fresh, it was served in huge slabs, and I like my ceviche prepared more finely cut. Wish I had a photo of it, but really, the presentation might have been ‘elegant’ but not that appetizing. The shiso was good, and did make for a nice balance with the fish. Overall though, we weren’t very impressed. No, we’re not to the level of Ceviche Bitches (yet), but we know our shit!

Next, the Crunchy Vegetables Salade (25 Euro), with Smoked Sesame Salt & Truffle Oil. Good, fresh veggies including mushrooms (fortunately not crunchy), legumes, cherry tomatoes, carrots, zucchini, pearl onions, even turnip served on a bed of arugula and friseé. It was served with a nice, light  vinaigrette, and was overall a very tasty salad and I dug the smoked sesame salt. Worth $30 bones? Without a big ‘ol chuck of steak, hells no! But you don’t come here for a Full Meal Deal, kittens.

For entreés, we had the Ferra Filet (28 Euro), with Creamy Onions, Beans & Tarragon Brioche. What? Ya don’t know what Ferra is, you cretin? Ha, we had no clue either. It’s a firm white fish from local waters in Switzerland and France. It came fried, and again was a very pretty little dish. But I tell ya, the fish was devoid (yes, devoid) of flavor! Without the sweet Tarragon Brioche it laid on, it would have been like eating air. Air that you chew, but still air. The creamy onions and green beans did have nice flavor though, and all put together made for a pretty good bite.

Next, the Lapin Paella (32 Euro), with Chorizo, Mussels & Prawns. That’s right – we ate Bugs! Hey at least it wasn’t Chevel. But, why oh why do they demand on pronouncing this dish ‘PI-ELLA’. It’s PI-A-YAH. Two Ls means you do not pronounce the L, it turns into a ‘YAH’. That’s right – screw you Gordon Ramsey I think you started it, or are at least propogating this bastardized version of its pronunciation!

Wow, who was on acid when they designed this bad boy? I mean, take a gander: This is messed up! In an impressive way. I guess this is what they mean by ‘gastronomiqué’! Sure, visually it was like seeing Paella in a museum, but I dunno, once broken down for bites, it just didn’t turn me on. The texture of the risotta perhaps. I mean, after a couple sophisticated bites, I went in like a butcher and mixed everything up into a nice maché, but the flavors didn’t all come together for me although individually you couldn’t really knock any individual component (except for the risotto).

We passed on the ‘Piece of Pig’, but I did love that menu name. Wait, here’s what it is, straight from the menu: Piece of pig : mignon fillet, foot and cheek. Braised leeks and juice-flavoured licorice. Say what? ‘juice-flavoured licorice’? Not to mention ‘Foot’. Anyway, if you’ve had it let us know!

Ding ding dessert time! Tartine Au Citron (13 euro), or, as the menu stated: The Lemon Tart As We Imagine. Okey dokey.  Anyhoo, it was ab-fab. Hell, it’s a Lemon Tart, people! The other J’s fave dessert I think, of all time. She digs Lemon Tart, in any language. And Tartine Au Citron sounds pretty sexy. It was pretty f’ing awesome, as I mentioned, perfectly sweet but not too sweet, great textures, obviously assembled by a dessert artisté as well. Sorry the pic is kinda dark, it doesn’t do it justice.

Along with the meal? A very nice 2006 Meursault Tillets (90 Euro) from Burgundy. A very well-made white, with excellent viscosity and mouthfeel, flavors of apple and pear and all-in-all a great accompaniment to the meal.

So would we recommend Les Ombres? Well, yes. It wasn’t as mind-blowing as we built it up to be, but 1) they put a ton of effort and care into each dish b) it is a pretty romantic spot 3) shit what was 3? Oh yeah, they get a ton of great reviews, so maybe we were just in the mood for something a bit more down to earth that night, or we just don’t know what we’re talking about! Either way, we’d probably give it another go!

So this was cool. As you may know, we love the crap out of Mexican food. Could eat it almost every day.  OK, every day. I hope I never have to choose between giving up Pizza or Mexican food. So, eons ago, like 10 years or so (aka 4 b.VdV.) we spent a few months in this awesome city, and hit up most of the Mexican places we could find.

And almost without fail, we’d get shitty margaritas (with NO ICE), and half-ass attempts at basic mexican cuisine. Hey I know, haters. It’s Paris, not Mexico City. But it is international! This city serves up some of the best Italian, Chinois and Greek food around. Then one day, as we were roaming around the Marais after hitting the Pompidou Museum, we walked past this cool little alley/square that just looked charming. We also heard some music…saw that there were a few dance studios down there…and then saw a sign…The Studio. Mexican Food! Long story short, we knocked down any poor bastards in our way, raced in and had a great Mexican meal. In Paris!

So back to why this was cool (refer to the first paragraph). Here we are in Paris after several return trips and we say to each other: “What do you want for our last lunch in Paris, mon cheri? Hey, what was that cool spot in the Marais by the dance studios where we had that fun Mexican meal 10 years ago?” Hey man, we were Up To Here with Moules. Problem, we had no idea of the name, or in fact if it was in the Marais. Or if it was still even open. But thanks to the power of the interweb, we found it. And we won’t forget it again!

This place has outdoor seating that occupies most of the little square, and like I said, it’s surrounded by dance studios which just gives it a great artsy vibe. On the inside (where beauty always really is;), it has a good Mexican flair. A fairly small, cozy spot with high ceilings and dark timbers, those traditional burnt orange colored walls, authentic lighting, and their cool lizard logo on the back wall. Some review I read said it was between “‘chi-chi’ and cozy”. It’s not chi-chi, it’s just cool, not presumptuous and pretty authentic. Ok, ’nuff said.

On to the food! We ordered the Studio Nachos we so fondly recalled. These are artsy nachos. Not a plate of chips with cheese whiz and tons of peppers. And may I say, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that! But that’s not these. This is one round, crisp corn chip, cut up like a pizza, each with perfect nacho Key Ingredient Distribution of cheddar and jack cheese, pico and jalapeno. It was a little different than our original visit, but still really good.

We also had the Plancha (skewers) with Poulet & Gambas, 2 skewers each of…Chicken and Shrimp, doi! Weird, they were served avec Frites, with BBQ sauce and some other odd, yet really tasty non-Mexican sauce. Tasted like it had a little bacon in it. The shrimp were in shell, and quite tasty. The bird was tender, breast and thigh meat in nice size cubes and went well with the BBQ sauce. And the fries – baby, the fries rocked it. Ha. They really did. Nice and crunchy on the outside, tender on the inside. Easier said than done. So no, not a very Mexican dish but WTF, it was good.

Last but not least. Wait! Have I lost my mind?? The margaritas! They have Reposado here! José Cuervo seems to own this city, so actually getting quality agave tequila? Priceless! And the owner Antonio mixes ‘em well – we had 3 each. Kick ass!

Now. Last but not least. We also had the Quesadilla avec Poulet. This was one stuffed ‘dilla, with a pant load of bird, just the right amount of nicely melted jack cheese, grilled yellow pepper and mushrooms. But no salsa! Waaahhh. As I was whimpering, the other J asked Antonio for salsa. The power of asking. Never ceases to amaze. Anyway, he brought out a mason jar of salsa his sister had just made. No shit. I don’t know how the hell she roastest those tomatoes so dark, with some smoky chipotle, carmelized onions and jalepenos. Outstanding! It made the quesadilla. Hey Antonio, put your sis to work and start selling this stuff!

Bonus? Antonio, who BTW is the sweetest dude…Hey! I can say that! Anyway, he has two of the coolest pups ever (aside from our boys Buster & Stanley, that is). A brown and a black lab. I think the black one, Kika, is the mom, about 2 years old and the pup is about 9 months or so. Awesome dogs, wrestling around, fetching, playing soccer goalie with tennis balls, doing 69s, all that cool canine hi-jinx.

So let’s keep this in perspective, kittens. Don’t come to Paris for Mexican food. But, if you’re lucky enough to be in this awesome city and get the hankerin’, come and hit this place up!

We (literally, it’s vacation time and the champagne flows freely and early) stumbled upon this place as we were randomly wandering the streets & alleys of the 5th and 6th Arrondissements. And crepes were defintiely on our hit list during our visit to Paris. So not people to hesitate – at least when it comes to eating & drinking – we dove into this place faster than Frenchman waves a white flag.

Anyhoo, this place is funky, kittens. Pretty wild, like the whole place – seats, tables, the whole kit ‘n kaboodle – was created out of a a mold. No not like bacteria, dumbo. Like a plaster mold.

Christ how do I explain this…hey look for yourself! Am I right or am I right?? Like it’s all made up of one contiguous (or continuous, I dunno) piece of molded material. You’d actually think maybe it’d be a great mexican spot with the orange and turquoise hues but 1) nope b) ‘Great’ and ‘Mexican’ do not belong in the same sentence when you’re talking Paris. With one or two exceptions, which I’ll drone about in the next post or two.

So I’m no Crepe Bitch, but I know what I like. I love Ti Couz and Café Bastille in SF, for instance. And I’ve had my fair share of crepes, both sweet and savory. In France and elsewhere. So there.

We had just eaten somewhere (something tells me that meal won’t make VdV, but I’m sure we enjoyed it) so weren’t super-ravenous. But we’re no sissies and went in for a savory crepe. The Hermine (9.60 Euro), to be exact. With Ham, Emmenthal Cheese, Onions, Lardons (Pork cubes), Mushrooms, Tomatoes, Egg and Salad. Good thing we were stuffed, right? Christ we’re pigs.

No. Wait. I’m a pig. No need dragging the other (lovely) J into my swine-ness.

So I had a visual what this crepe would look like when it arrived. And y’know what? Damn was I wrong.

Christ how do I explain this…hey look for yourself! Am I right or am I right?? (Maybe dumb, but right). Holy crap was this a crepe or some f’d-up French version of a Big Mac avec Oeuf?

I mean, it was almost daunting. Hell, something about France has to be, it may as well be this crepe, am I right? OK, I’ll stop with that. No, not France-bashing bitch, repeating ‘Am I right?’ over and over. Come on!

Well, whatever. There’s abso-f’ing-lutely nothing wrong with the appearance it just surprised me. And me likee surprises. Plus, it Tasted Grrrrreat!! There’s some serious flavors and ingredients goin’ on here. Dang. The Kitchen Sink Crepe, it could be called. But all the flavors went very well together, ya got a little fat from the pork, some excellent melted fromage with slightly salty ham, tender & tasty ‘shrooms, and once you mash the shit out of that egg all over the top of the crepe you get awesome bites each and every time. I did move that salad off to the side though. Nothing against salad, it just went better separate.

So this place is pretty popular, for good reasons. It had a good, fun crowd, our server was very friendly, the service was fast, food was good, prices reasonable. Très bien, Creperie Saint-Germain!

First, hip hip hooray for the exchange rate! So what if Greece & Spain go down in flames and drag the EU with them – the US$ is finally worth something over here in Europe! And itsa dang good thing son, ‘cuz dining at places like Le Jules Verne can get a tad spendy. But I’m gonna give you a spoiler alert right now and tell ya: this place is worth every Franc.

So, of course we weren’t gonna keep yammering about pizza and salads while we’re in Paris. We’re goin’ upscale French today, bitches! Alain Ducasse style! Woo Hoo! That’s right, the Michelin-star awarded Alain Ducasse. Not the other one.

So when we lived here, we never went up the Eiffel Tower. Dunno why, maybe it seemed too touristica. Well, that was stupid we discovered, as we were whisked to the top of the tower for the best lunch we’ve ever had, at Le Jules Verne.

We actually thought JV was located at the mid-point of the Tower, but hells no. It’s at the tip-top, about 130m up. The views up here are sick, even with the occasional storms rolling through. The place actually has three dining areas, each relatively small, fitting 14 or so tables (mainly 2-tops) each. It’s the way they had to construct it to fit within the structure of the tower, plus it gives each room a little more intimacy. They’re decked out in rich brown hues that also complement the colors of the arches of the tower. Fancy!

VdV insider tip: 1) Make a resie, fool b) Request a table in the middle room; you’ll get the best views.

Weird French thing? (Yes, yes I know…redundant). When the waiter gave us our menus, we noticed one had a white band (Janine’s) and one a black band (mine). Yep, the black band had the prices, the white band not. Don’t they know it’s the year 2010?! Better yet, don’t they know Janine could buy & sell me?! Anyhoo, we went for the Dejuner (prix fix) menu at 85 Euro each. Nope, wine is not included.

So the first thing to arrive was a little Duck Liver w/ Pistachios on a Bed of Paté number. Yes, the other J’s favorite! Just kidding. And no, we didn’t order this, it just arrived. Well, I’m not a big fan either, but I had to go in. And I’ll tell you, if you at all like this type of thing, you’d love this little bite. Artery-clogging rich, with excellent texture and the nuts added a nice almost woody taste. Along with it – an excellent flute of Laurent Perrier Rosé bubbly. We needed something good to wash that down with.

The first course for me was a Shellfish Velouté, Mushrooms and Chervil Infusion. We learned that Velouté is basically a bisque-style soup. This was wicked awesome, and I think the best part of the entire meal. The seafood bisque included lobster and crab as well as some wood mushrooms, with a morel foam on top.  This was super-rich, perfectly spiced with an earthy quality from the mushrooms. The waiter looked a little peeved when I lifted the bowl up to slurp up every last drop.

For the other J, Steamed White Asparagus, Mimosa Garnish and Citrus Fruit Mousse. As we foodies know, the white variety is the most tricky to prepare, but if done well, Cést Magnifique! Plus, white asparagus doesn’t result in…asparagus pee! Word. Anyhoo, as with everything here the presentation is spot-on, and the flavors worked perfectly together. Three stalks of nice, tender asparagus with an orange zest, shaved egg and a caper caviar.

Next course! Bresse Chicken Fricasseé, New Vegetables in a Marbles Cooking Juice. Yah, kind of a strange description. Lemme tell you, this an’t no Poulet Roti. This was a fantastic meal, Bresse chicken is da best, and it was cooked perfectly, very tender and flavorful, in its own juices with baby carrots, onions, & mushrooms. Basic goodness. ‘Nuff said.

For me, the Roasted Challans Duckling, French-style Broad Beans and Peas. Ordered and served medium-rare. Again, this was a rich meal. And I’m not the biggest fan of duck, but it seemed the French thing to do. I tell ya, an assembled fork-full of Daffy, a pea and a piece of pickled onion made for a killer bite. I couldn’t finish it all, it was just too rich pour moi.

Ding ding, dessert time! Hey man, if you know J&J ya know, at least when we’re not on holiday, that we usually only have a salad for lunch. Maybe with Grilled Chicken.  Holy criminy, I thought we might blow up. But we’re no quitters! J had the Bitter Chocolate & Raspberry Tartlet, which was scrump-dili-icious. How the hell couldn’t it be? And low calorie to boot! It was a good-looking number too. I had the Strawberry & Rhubarb on a Soft Biscuit w/ Pistachio Cream. It was a nice, not overly sweet dessert. Nice bright flavors from the fruits and the pistachio cream added a nice balance to the biscuit.

But were they done fattening us up like…geese before they’re turned into Foie Gras? No siree, Marcel. Then they brought over a pantload of truffles and peach marshmallows. And cookies! I mean, there were 16 truffles (I had to count), 10 marshmallows and 1/2 dozen cookies. Why  not throw in a barf bag too? Hell, they should force you to walk the gazillion stairs back down after a meal like this! But we did have to ‘try’ them all. The truffles were excellent (I pocketed a few), and the peach marshmallows were awesome. I thought they might get a little messy in my pocket so we left most of them.

So, bottom line (finally)? It’s not cheap (with all the vino we drank the bill was north of 300 euro), but Le Jules Verne brings it. The service, atmosphere, preparation, flavors, views, everything. We bestow on Le Jules Verne the coveted VdV 5-star rating (I’m sure we just made Alain’s day;)

Yes, VdV is different. Vive la Difference! We zig when others may zag. Case in point? While  in NYC, we dined at Cercle Rouge for great French food. Yes, the day before leaving for France. And now in Paris, for our first meal, we dined on…Italian food, when we’re gonna be in Capri in a few days. No we’re not stupid, we’re gonna grub on our fair share of Moules Frites, Steak Tartare, Croissants, Crepes, Poulet Roti, Cheval and all that. OK, maybe we’ll pass on Mr. Ed.

Anyway, back to Del Papa. This place is in the 6th, just down from our hotel. We discovered it a few visits back, and hit it almost every time we’re here. For thin crust Margherita Pizza (10 euro). Last night we felt frisky and even added mushrooms! And, the Rucola Salad with Parmesan (10.50 euro). Or is it Parmesan with a side of Rucola? Take a look at that!  And it was a gorgeous night to sit outside and get cigarette smoke blown in your face. Wait, I mean a great night to sit outside, people watch and enjoy the warm Summer air.

Question: how the hell does it stay light out at 10p? I mean, Paris is about the same latitude as Portland, Oregon and it doesn’t stay light that late there. Help!

So note, Pizza and salad is all we know about this spot, can’t tell ya much about the pastas, etc. etc.

So would I fly here for the food? Would I come across Paris for it? No, but if you are in the 6th Arrondissement area, this place has very good thin crust pies, and very fresh salads. Plus a fair amount of outdoor seating.

We’ve been coming to Alcazar and the uber-cool upstairs club A2Z Bar for years, people. We celebrated 2001 NYE here, soon after it opened for biz, and it was one of the first places we had dinner back in the day. It was and is a cool spot. Gotta love the dining downstairs, happenin’ bar/club upstairs gig. Kinda like a mullet – business in the front, party in the back.

This place has remained largely the same since it opened in 2000, with a modern, sleek, vibe. It’s basically two big rooms, with a white and red color scheme. The club is a mezzanine over the ground level dining room, and most of the roof is  a huge skylight.

So we saunter in here last night, getting all Euro and deciding to have dinner at about 11:30. Actually for a Tuesday I think that was beyond most Frenchies dining time. They still had a decent dinner crowd, but most folks were well through their din-din. So we got busy and immediately ordered. Drinks, that is!

Ok, then we ordered food. And it kinda chapped my hide that although we coursed it, or at least requested they coursed it, the entire f’ing meal showed up at once. Salads, sides and entreé. I hate that! For some odd reason we let them get away with it. And that was the start of what I listed as our ‘con’ with Alcazar. The front of the house kinda sucked last night. That was example #1.

Anyhoo, we went for a traditional French dish but with a VdV twist – Steak Frites w/ Peppercorn Sauce (33 Euro), but with Filet instead of Entecote. Rare, bitch! With what had to be Duck Fat Frites. Holy crap. These were perfectly cook fries, not matchsticks, but the more meaty variety, with some nice burn on the outside, meaty and tender on the inside.  JHC, these bad boys were rich, my blood pressure sky rocketed after just 3. But they rocked, especially dipping them in the peppercorn sauce or spicy mustard the French seem to know how to pull off like no one else. But hey, F the fries let’s talk meat! The filet was fairly small, about 7-8 oz, but cooked dead-on rare and tender as veal. Rockin’.

Nest, we had an Hericot Verte Salad (12 Euro), basically French Green Beans in a Tomato Mashe. Bam. Fresh, nicely blanched beans. Very good. But I’m not wasting my 15-word-per-minute typing (skills) on beans.

And, the Salade Verte (6 Euros). A green salad. Basic. Hey whatdya want for a measly 6 Euro?! It was fresh, with sundried tomatoes, some micro-arugula and a nice clean vinaigrette. Very good as well.

And then…the appy that never showed up! Example #2 of sucky front of house.

Then…crickets. No one asked us anything. And it wasn’t like we were in a dark corner booth necking. Ha. Necking. We saw our initial server scurry out the front door (busted, Emilie!), so I snagged a randon dude and asked (very politely) for two more drinks. He said fine, then we never saw him again. The case of the vanishing servers. Example #3.

So 3rd time’s a charm, we snagged another dude server that ended up being the most partonizing (“Oh, you know French”, when we basically said ‘Oui’) d-bag – Example #4 – but in the end did finally get us our drinks. The other J had some words with the manager Elody (Melody sans M)  after the meal, and at least she seemed genuinely sorry and invited us back for some better treatment.

So as we have discussed, bad service can screw up an otherwise great meal. I mean, cooking is difficult; being somewhat organized and pleasant should not be that tricky. But anyway, maybe since we have had lots of good experiences here, and the food was pretty good, and the fact that after you eat you can dance your ass off upstairs, it still will get a slight VdV nod of approval. 3.5 for food, 1 for service. Pull it together Alcazar, we want to love you!

This is classic. Not so long ago we visited our wonderful city of Paris (we lived here for a short period) and were asking our concierge at the Artus Hotel about this place cuz we couldn’t remember the name of it!! No lie, “We’re looking for the name of that cool Asian restaurant across from the George V Hotel”. Uhhhh, maybe Asian?! Damn, fools we are.  We used to go here all the time when we lived here. It’s got to be at least a decade old which says a bunch for a restaurant’s life in Paris.

In the ‘first impressions count’ category, super hotties (both women and men, ladies and gents…or gents and ladies…whatever) greet you at the front door and escort you downstairs to the spacious, dark, attractive restaurant area. Odd, they have a “smoking” area and “non smoking” area with no partition.
Hmmm. How does that work, again? BTW, we hear the Frenchies are picketing in the streets as we speak against a No-smoking ban that’s supposed to take affect Jan 1. Hey, if it can happen in London it can happen anywhere!

This place has a super great layout. You walk through this uber cool bar area with an Asian jungle-like feel with palm trees and cool hidden nooks to hang. You need to walk through the bar to get downstairs to the restaurant, brilliant design. A bit cheesola? You can buy t-shirts at the bar…oh well. No, we didn’t buy any. And I take offense to the question!

Everytime we’ve been there, the food comes out in record time…this time before the drinks which was weird…did they use some bizarre ESP to know what we wanted? Almost too fast, but we’re not gonna whine. Very good spring rolls and some really amazing miso black cod. So tender you could eat it with a spoon. Seriously can’t remember what else we had, but we licked the plate clean. Side note: They also serve up some great looking sushi, but it wasn’t a sushi nite for ‘ol J&J.

After din din go upstairs and people watch at the bar, and sip a $20 drink (I mean, SIP). One thing, it won’t get going until at least midnight. Oh and if it’s the one man show, he does some great Neil Diamond covers, yikes. That guy is definitely getting some cougar action!

Bottom line, the food has always been a solid 7 1/2, and along with the atmosphere, great service and hot employees, pushes it to an 8 1/2!

VdV Rating: 4

Asian
30 Avenue George V
75008 Paris
01 56 89 11 00

OK, next. Désolé pour le retarder. What was I writing about, anyway? Oh yes, The perfect day, Sunday, our second day, in Paris. Sweet Jesus. Let’s break it down, and preface it with pas de Musée de Louvré. Light on culture, let’s say. Heavy on tourisme français.

Let’s break it down:

1) Early AM run on the Seine. Had the city to ourselves. Gorgeous. Ran past the Place de la Concorde and noticed they were settin’ up for the finish of the Tour de France.

2) Nice breakfast in the Artus Hotel, where we mapped out our tourist strategy over eggs & patisserie, and…mimosas, of course.

3) OK, here’s where it starts. Wandered around Place Vendome and the fancy-shmancy jewelry shops… then off to the Opera House. Actually did a self-guided tour (very un-J&J-like). Gorgeous architecture. Chagall on the ceiling. Very nice.

4) Next stop – Montmare & Sacré Cour. Been here a hundred times when we lived here. Beautiful early 20th century church, looks very mosque-like actually. And Montmare has a great little square jammed with artists and…you guessed it…cafés to enjoy
glass after glass of Bandol Rosé. It actually started absolutely pouring rain, like raining harder than you can imagine while we were there. So we took refuge under the awning of a cool café, ordered up some Poulet Roti and Bandol, and watched the action. Those artist-stall people Do Not Leave under any weather conditions!

5) Then, off to the 5th. The Latin Quarter, San Michel and home of the Sorbonne. Cool, bohemian spot, the 5th. Plus home to more Greek restaurants per square block this side of Athens.  And of course a couple glasses of rosé to quench our thirsts while we people watched outside of San Michel.

6) Next stop, the Tour Eiffel, of course. Never changes, but always cool.
Damn. No places to grab a quick glass of vin! So we ran across the Seine by Diana’s bridge and found a cool outdoor spot, where everyone ogled our iPhones (they are not released
in Europe yet).

7) Then we hit the Champs Elysees & caught the end of the Tour de Farce.
Then a (long, ‘cuz I took a wrong turn) walk home and a nappy.

Back up at 10PM. Drinks and then din din @ midnight at the Alcazar in the 6th, also the home of the A-Z bar, where we spent NYE 2001! More drinks and then home at 2. Ahh…I love Europe.

Next, hear about our crazy dinner with a famous actor!

Bon Jour mon ami! Wassup? So, we had a little biz to do in Paris (is that not cool?), and what’d ‘ol J&J do? Turn it into a long weekend, bien sur! Who mixes pleasure with business?! Bingo! Vindivine, suckas, and all for you.

Yes, kittens, we did of course start out the early early AM prior to our flight out to Paris, via the ATL of all places, by poppin’ a bottle of Dom. Doi. How fitting! (hint for the slowski’s: french wine/french trip). And we especially needed the lubrication since we flew Smelta Airlines ‘cuz we cashed in our hard-earned AMEX points for some free biz-class tickets. Woo Hoo! But Delta BLOWS. Just take my word. Y’all want a crassant?’ Yuck. Tres miserablé. I mean, Atlanta-based business all suck in my opinion (including the Braves and the Falcons. Especially MICHAEL VICK, what an a-hole). ‘

Anyhoo, at risk of dragging this into the most agonizing  long (yet charmingly poetic) post ever, I’ll cut to the chase. Not one, but two juicy bits of yummy recommendations, served up fresh:

1) The VdV Insider’s tip on Where to Stay in Paris, and
2) A perfect day in Paris. HOLD THE HELL ON – This is gonna be way too long as it is, check for this in the next post!

Okey dokey. First, this ain’t no Las Ventanas crap we’re smackin’ your ass with. Not today. Not with the
dollar at such measley, Canadian loonie-like rates as it is. This is a more practical VdV post. And the place to stay is…drumroll, please…the Artus Hotel! And it rocks. Hey, we know all the shwank, shnobby places in Paris that’ll gobble up your dough –
Bristol, George V, Hotel de Crillon, yada yada. Pass! Go boutique, people. But that’s tough too – lotsa ’boutique’ joints are the size of a sardine can with the sounds of hookers fighting out in the alley all night long. And even in French, it starts losing its romantic luster after 3AM. So we were happy happy with Artus.

The Artus is located right off the Saint Germain and Rue di Buce. In the 6th arroindissment, which is the best area – tons of outside cafés, cool narrow little side streets with shops, Saint Germain, loaded with restaurants and great shopping, Luxembourg Gardens, you name it.

Anyway, we arrived early, right around 10 AM, feeling appropriately greasy and grimy after 14 hours in the air. Desperately wanting a shower, shall we say. Pepe LePeu. But check in isn’t until 3PM. We were a little freaked on the taxi ride in.  But our man, Sanjay, already had a room ready for us! Woo Hoo! He actually looked at the little form where I said ‘early arrival’.

And a great room at that -  good sized room by French standards, prolly almost 300ft or so, nice large marble bathroom & shower (yea!), flat screen TV, large armoire, super cool. Great, friendly service, even when we blew out the power in 1/2 the city with our American hair dryer! And shockingly quiet, esp on the back side of the hotel. Only 220 Euros per night, fully loaded (taxes incl.) + a scrumptious breakfast to boot. The only knock – 10 Euros PER HOUR for WiFi! I mean, per day maybe, but per hour?! So we ended up surfing from our snazzy new iPhones which ended up costing us over $2000 (more about that later – watch out when surfing and emailing internationally on your iPhone!)

Anyhoo, let’s end on a high note – check out the Artus, you’ll love it.

Artus Hotel
34 rue di Buci
Paris 75006
Tel: +33 1 43 29 07 20

Book online through Tablet Hotels – great international hotel selection and awesome service